Wackiest ways to curb Global Warming

"According to a new U.N. report, the global warming outlook is much worse than originally predicted. Which is pretty bad when they originally predicted it would destroy the planet." --Jay Leno

Women and Earth complement each other in more than one way. Both are difficult to comprehend and both are getting hotter every day. Two major challenges that today’s men facing are “How to stop the woman from doing shopping and how to stop the Earth from heating”. I am not that brainy to advice on the former one. So let’s go to the lesser interesting topic i.e. “How to curb Global Warming”.

One of my friends who was obsessed with global warming and concerned about the girls (No you read it right. I did not interchange the words) was complaining me the other day. He was saying that the girls and the globe form an unending “Loop of Cause” for Global Warming. He said “As the globe is getting hot, girls in my office are wearing lesser cloths, which in turn makes the girl look hot and also makes the surroundings hot. So the Earth gets even hotter. To bear the heat the girls shed one more cloth and the surroundings...” I had to pour a pot of cold water on his head to cool him down.

Well let’s follow some simple tips to save water, power and fuel to save our only home.

Saving Water:

It is predicted that by 2050 one third of the globe will face severe water shortage. So let us use less water and save it more for the future. So those who take bath daily, try giving a day break and those who take bath weekly, try alternate weeks. I sincerely thank to those who take bath occasionally. Scheduling your shower timings according to the monsoon is also one of the best ways to save water.

To those who are saving water but are dependent on deodorants, understand that the deo sprays produce CFC (chloro fluro carbons) that depletes Ozone layer. So shift to the solid de odorants (Sticks) instead of using aerosols. Guys don’t get carried away by Axe ads. You know it’s far from reality.

Not taking bath and also not using the deodorants helps in more than one way. One can save water, Ozone layer and also curb population explosion (That's a stinky joke isn't it? :) ).

Avoid the wastage of water. Drink alcohol without mixing water or go for Tequila shots.

Saving Power:

Saving power is very easy if you are newly married and if it’s cold out side (Oh my God...are you thinking of browsing the net for a new room heater?).if you are in the phase where the magic in your life has just vanished after 5 years of your married life, then you can try getting into some heated arguments with your wife to stay warm in the winter cold. And if you are a bachelor, I better don’t advice you.

It's not just your home where you should save power and the power bills. You can also follow this at your office. Switch off your PC after the work hours or stay on Bench to avoid switching on your PC.

Finally avoid hot water bath to save power, both hot water and taking the bath to save power and water.

Saving Fuel:

Do car pooling. Approach the girls who are near to your residence and offer them a free pick up and drop facility daily. They would not say no. I tried and it works (Now I get calls from them even on Saturday nights asking me to drop at their boy friend's apartment and pick them up on Monday mornings to office). Even if you have a bike you can do pooling by riding triples (Do not think about the fine you pay, think about how fine the situation can get). If you are a girl, it’s very easy you think of doing car pooling and half the office staff will shift their homes to your locality.

Avoid using of vehicles to go to near by places. Instead, go by walk so that you don’t miss any gorgeous girls on the way. Also when you drive, drive smart. So don’t let your wife behind the wheels. Use public transport. You never know whom you bump into. (I once bumped into a lady ticket inspector in the bus without a ticket and she almost stripped me naked)

Also save trees, use less paper (students you just boycott the class if teacher insists you to buy a book). Use plastic responsibly to avoid pollution as well as to control the population (If you did not get this joke also. Then stop reading my blogs). Also create awareness amongst your friends about global warming. I often raise this issue with my female colleagues. When ever we cross our paths I will stop and say “Is this the effect of global warming or it’s just that you who is making me feel hot”.

Follow all these tips to go green also create awareness among children to make them better citizens than us. Leave your comments and let me know what you can do from your side to save the earth.

Please do not print this post unless it is absolutely necessary. Spread environmental awareness.