Battle of Sexes Part-2

I would have done with my Analysis (of part -1) by now, if only the lady respondents of my survey returned with their answers. The questionnaire had only one open ended question which was "What woman really wants?” After a month's time, I called up every one and I got just one answer:
"We are not done yet, need more time".

Anyways, to make the analysis comprehensive and convincing, I wish to take some more time and ponder over few more incidents that have left me as baffled as I was with the previous one.

"You are such a narrow minded male chauvinist" she said and her nose flared in anger. "I am in no mood to argue" I said. "Okay then convince me". Without waiting for my response she went and slumped in the chair near the swimming pool.

She was my colleague in my first company ; a manufacturing firm. We were in a resort and along with us were 40 other employees carrying various ranks. (The team outing would have been more fun without the team building games that were forced on us by HR). I walked to her and took the seat next to her.

she:I never tasted whiskey and this is the time (suppressing the anger)
Me: Believe me. The cheaper one doesn’t taste better and the better one doesn’t have any taste.

She: (Coying)But I want to know what happens after taking a glass or two.
Me: You can watch me and I will not charge you for that.

She: (Smiling) Very funny. But what's your problem if I want to drink.
Me: (Long lecture) I never said I have a problem. But what I am asking you to think twice before you do that. We work in a manufacturing firm. Those guys you see (pointing the guys dancing next to the pool). They are from different culture, education and background. You think they are broadminded enough to accept a girl who tastes liquor? They will judge you wrong and what happens here doesn’t just stay here. We will be with this people every day. So better think before you act.

The party took a wild swing as I was talking; some one dragged me to the dance floor. The next day morning, a phone call woke me up and started my lazy Sunday.

She: (An affectionate tone)Vardhan
Me: Hey Tell me. How come you called me?

She: I am very grateful to God. Yesterday, you saved me from the impulsive feeling.
Me: Why did the God take all the credits then?

She: What?
Me: Never mind. It's a tough joke.

She: (Breathing heavily) You don’t understand Vardhan. I am so glad to have a friend like you. I am happy that I asked you to accompany. If it were others....(I cut her words)
Me: Never mind yaar. Anyways if you still want to try out whiskey, we two can go out some time.

She: (Dead silence)
Me: Hello? Hello? You there?

She: (After a long pause)...Yes
Me: Oh.... (Smiling) I thought the line got cut.

She: No (Serious tone). But now it will. Don’t ever talk to me again. (Thumping of the receiver)

That's it I never did get a chance to know what went wrong between us as she was in a different (Manufacturing) plant. Down the line, both of us took different paths. One of us is more successful, happy and settled in America and another is not so lucky. To be clear, she married some software geek and got settled in US.

Coming back to the point.My offer was as genuine and pure as Vat 69. I never had a different thought process running in my head while I spoke to her. If only my mind could process dual things at a time, I would not end up being a sole reader of my blog. Anyways this discussion also will share few lines in the analysis part that comes after I completely understand about the psychology of women. I can bet a fortune that the analysis might not come to the light in my life span. So allow me to come up with one more post to gain a better hold on the subject (No pun intended).

The New (Year) Resolution

The funny aspect of New Year resolution is that, many of us try a work around to break the commitment. Thus making them sound more like a financial instruments that comes with terms & conditions. For an instance my colleague took a resolution to conserve water; he’s been living on deodorants. My friend resolved that she will stop gossiping about others, ever since she stopped talking to me. My Colleague, who stopped buying cigarettes, is getting it from others. I, like my friends and colleagues was never a good keeper of my resolutions. It’s quite evident from my history of resolutions.

Year 2000: To be more popular. (I made it to attendance shortage list)
Year 2001: Not to do last minute studies before exam. (I did not do, I flunked in two)
Year 2002: No more additions to "Crush List". (....Wait who is that?)
Year 2003: Impress my boss. (I asked her out for a date. I am looking for a new job now.)
Year 2004: Achieve a six figure paycheck like my friends did. (I am converting my salary to Zimbabwean dollars before telling anyone)
Year 2005: Spend less time on TV. (I am using my laptop to watch movies)
Year 2006: I no longer will doze off in the class. (I found a nice corner to sleep)
Year 2007: I will to go to Gym at least 5 days a week; (I am driving past it now)
Year 2008: This year I‘ve made good number of resolutions. (Once I remember all of them I will start implementing one by one)
Year 2009: Recollect the past resolutions and line them up for future in the order of FIFO (Including this resolution)

In the Year 2010, I resolved not to procrastinate more, but I think I will wait till next year. But after all, why do we wait all the year to make a commitment on 31st night! Well, blame it on Romans who started this ritual. Romans named the month "January" after their mystical king Janus who is depicted with two faces .Thus he looks forward (towards new year) and backward (towards old year) at the same time. Symbolizing that the mistakes in the old year are not forgotten in the New Year.

With due respect to the King Janus, I would say any day is a good day to start afresh. The motive behind taking a resolution is to make the actual life style more like an ideal life style. The ideal life style is all about dreams like making workout as a part of the routine or doing charity like working on neglected children(probably of their own) or giving up some dangerous addictions (like TV serials or reality shows) etc. But this requires a strong will, an unwavering determination and an ability to stand against all odds to keep the commitments. The most arduous effect involves in fighting the inner demons, which in my case I end up taking their side.


I will be branded as double faced (not like king Janus) if I try to preach the ways to keep the resolution, but that's how I end this blog. Make one resolution at a time, which is practical, and attainable. Make it more interesting by adding few incentives. Do not scrap the resolution because of slip ups. As I said controlling the inner urge and keep the consistency in the commitment is the key success to win. So go ahead and start afresh as someone rightly said “Every day is a new day for the rest of our life”